I appreciate the fact that you're a mouser and love to catch the little buttheads when they run about the house. Thank you for moving once in a while and chasing them despite the fact you have no front claws and one eye. I have but a few complaints. 1. Please do not destroy and knock over everything in my room and bathroom at 1 AM. As you're not pretty when you get interupted sleep, as am I. 2. Please do not brag when you catch a mouse. Should you decide to, please make sure the hind legs and tail are NOT hanging out of your mouth. and 3. MOST OF ALL, do NOT leave mouse parts strewn all over my bedroom floor.
Thanks so much - Your slave, Tina
Ive paid you up to date and beyond. Now leave me alone. For your refrence, it was check #666.
Thanks - Justin West-Waaaaaaagner. (Im not going to pay you if you cant say my flippin' name right)