Music:Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart (Cherry Pop (sykoradio.net))
Losing Sean has made me think about a lot of things recently. Death, life, the unknown. You never know what can happen in a few hours, days, months, years. They always say you should appreciate the people you love and always tell them you love them. I do that anyways. I guess it makes me think of Sean and how he was in High School. You never know what can happen to you tomorrow. Did he ever wake up knowing in high school that he would never have kids? Did he ever wake up knowing he would never make it to twenty three? Did he know he would never grow old? I wonder if when something like this happens you have any insight or if it's unexpected. Everyday I look at Eli and know something could happen to him, so I always dig up just a little bit more patience. I never get angry with him, because I want his life to be the best it can. I never push over that line of frustration. You never know... I don't know. I guess it really makes me remember how short life can be.
I wish I was in Florida so I could attend his funeral. My thoughts are there, but I dont know... I just feel crushed. I havent even spoken to him in years, but he was the type of person that just touched your heart. Im having an extremely rough night right now.
"Would seem lonely If you were the only star in the night?
You've got to believe It'll be alright in the end You've got to believe It'll be alright again
Time is a ribbon, a silent icy river (froze us all) Running deep, deep and fast Enough to get lost down in the flow Crashing around These tiny lives mean everything
And nobody knows What's gonna happen tomorrow So don't let go Now we've come this far
Hold my hand please Understand me You're never alone"