My beloved Tina,
These past four months have i can say been the most trying of our relationship yet. I hate to think of the times that we have still ahead. You know, the woorld is filled with imperfect people. I being one of the less perfect of course. All i know is what i feel to be right in my heart; you and i feels right to me. Our family, elijah, feels right. My service to my country, feels right, unless i am in the front leaning rest position. All these things i hold true and dear in my heart. You above them all. Lately, i can say that things have been rather rough and ragged for our marriage. At least this is how i precieve things. We have been in several arguements about the one thing that we should not argue about, money. You know i read a statistic somewhere that the leading cause of marriages ending within the first three years is because of money arguements. When we took our vows to each other, we both vowed that we would stick by each other for richer or for poorer. Well, right now just happens to be a low spot in our finances, and we both know that we are only holding out till the 15th. That would be the beauty of the military pay system, you get paid in just enough time to not go completely broke. But money is not something that you and i should be at an arguement about. I know that i have been rather bad with the whole money thing, but i am trying to be better about it. You see, where as you have no time, you are constanly busy, i sometimes have a lot of down time. This makes things very hard for me to cope at times, laying around on my bunk for hours on end just in my books when i have so much free time and all i have done all day is study. But that is not really the point that i am trying to make. I know that things are going to be rough our first year together. Hell, i don't even have the slightest clue as to what my first year in the regular army is going to have in store for me. I hope that it is not a whole lot to exciting. We just have to stick together and hold out. I promise that one day, things will be normal and you and i will have a normal army life.
Another sore spot for me has been that i can't see you. And the fact that the U.S. is in fact at war and are about to wage war on another country, makes army life very hard. I am part of that edge that makes up the broad sword of the world. Hell, i am being told that because i am a soldier, especially a combat medic, that the chances of our marriage lasting are slim to none. They don't know you and i. We have always beat the odds. Here we are now. we did it again just by being together now. i just miss you so much.
I love you baby,
always and forever yours,